Blue Sky

[Sara]

Charis nodded slowly, "It fits her," She continued with an impish smile; "She looks younger than her years - or did, the last time I saw her.Big beautiful blue eyes and blonde hair - although she's taller than me, she was when she was just a girl." She smiled to herself. She remembered complaining bitterly to her mother that she'd inherited her diminutive size whilst her siblings grew to be lanky and graceful sorts. Her mother had merely smirked to herself and said that being petite was nothing to be ashamed of. Charis had retorted that it was when she couldn't reach the top shelf. She smiled to herself at the memory. "She's very sweet, very kind. She always wanted to be a help but..." She shook her head, "She understands less of the world than me. She can be a little..." She winced, "Naive, sometimes." Probably Tertius' ideal slave, come to think of it. 

But as conversations so often did with Tertius, they were soon back to darker pastures and she looked down. A lump came to her throat and she sensed - even from her lowered gaze - that he sat up straighter. This was her last chance. This was it. In truth, that was probably fair. He'd given her handfuls of opportunities to be the slave he wanted her to be, and she'd failed time and time again from her own foolishness and headstrong ways. She resolved herself to this new normal. She'd be good - better than good - and honest. It was the only way to make sure everything was in place for her child, their child as he reminded her. 

She smiled a little to herself and nodded, "Thank you domine, I understand. And I am grateful." 

 

TAG: @Atrice

[Atrice]

It was nice to see Charis smile, he thought once more. And thinking and talking about her sister made her smile. She said Nymphias was a perfect name for her sister and that she had blue eyes and blonde hair and was a bit taller than Charis too. Well Charis was petite, it would be unlikely that a grown woman was shorter than her! She continued about her sister, saying how sweet and kind she was, but that she could also be a little naïve. Tertius nodded, “I hope Rome has treated her well then… it’s easy to get in trouble here, if you are not careful. But I’m sure Rufus takes good care of her.” Tertius replied to her with a smile of his own, Rufus had been sick the one time he was here and he wasn’t sure if Charis’ tisane helped (she had a bad history with those now, didn’t she?)… but he had seemed nice enough to Tertius.

Then the conversation had turned a bit more serious. She was glad he would give her a second chance and he recalled they had discussions before and how she had broken his trust before. Like back when that Helios turned up with tales of Charis’ falseness to him. So this was not the second chance. This was the last chance. What he’d do if she broke his trust again… he didn’t know yet. But he hoped for her sake and his own, that she would not do it. She said thanked him, said she was grateful and she understood.

“Good, I’m glad to hear that.” Tertius said and reached for a peach and chewed a bit on it, “I’m glad we had this talk, Charis. And that you are feeling better and that you have become more… compliant now.”

@Sara

[Sara]

"I don't think Ardra...Nymphias," She blinked, trying to get used to the name, "Has been in trouble a day in her life. She likes to be helpful, to please people," She sighed softly. It also made her...gentler, and more impressionable which is what worried Charis more than anything about her sister being here - in an atmosphere if it was anything like the domus she herself resided it. "But I'm sure she's fine. And thank you again, domine. Would you like to send a note to Senator Rufus? Or I could wri-." She cut herself off. He'd not said she could resume her reading and writing and it was foolish of her to ask. Stupid girl!

Charis reached for an already poured cup of wine, watered wine, but wine nonetheless and took a sip. She'd only really been allowed very watered lora since Tertius' edict and her imprisonment and proper wine was a marvel to her. She savoured it. She merely smiled to herself as he called her compliant and nodded her head in thanks.

"May I ask you something, domine? About after the baby comes?" She took another sip of wine, for courage.

 

TAG: @Atrice

[Atrice]

Charis explained how she did not think her sister had ever been in trouble, because she liked to be helpful and to please people. Well that could be an issue too, in a city like Rome. It would be easy for someone to take advantage of her then, Tertius thought to himself. But Charis was sure her sister was fine anyway and spoke of sending a note to Rufus, but then caught herself as she suggested to write it herself. Tertius had given up the lessons of writing and reading to Charis completely now. She knew enough for someone who did not need to know. He had enjoy the lessons though, but she… she was just once more making a fool out of him. He had put her too high up on a pedestal. It had now been torn down.

 “I’ll send him a note.” Tertius simply replied, “And I am sure she is fine too. I didn’t mean she would cause any trouble though. I meant others could do it for her, or to her. But let’s see. There is no need to worry until we know something.” He added, he didn’t want Charis to worry too much, but he would do this for her. Even if it was probably too much already. He was indeed full of surprises today and maybe now it was enough.

 But Charis wasn’t done. She had a question and he arched a brow and picked up a handful of dates to eat, “You may.”

@Sara

[Sara]

"Thank you domine." Was all she said. So writing was definitely off the cards now, and she wouldn't practice without his blessing. She didn't know what he'd do if he found a tabula or something in her rooms, and decided the risk wasn't worth it. If somebody sent her a note, she'd read it and  then return it - but that was a very big if.

As he let her continue she sipped her wine and offered a half-smile. "I...suppose I just don't know practical things," It sounded silly, trivial, "Like...if I should find a midwife for the birth? O-or if friends can be there? And where baby will sleep? A-and I suppose his name?" The latter was a leading question, of course. If her child was a slave then he'd undoubtedly name it something Charis didn't enjoy, but if the child was freed? She honestly had no idea. 

"Just silly things," She said and sipped her wine, "B-but three months is not a long time until he comes and I don't know who else to ask." 

 

TAG: @Atrice

[Atrice]

At least she knew how to read and write now and she should be grateful enough for that, even though she then deceived him, failed to tell him about her child and tried to get rid of that and to kill herself too in the process. After all he did for her. Teaching her things, giving her fancy dresses, giving her more liberty than the other slaves, letting her have her own room (almost)… then she chose to do what she did to him. So she should be grateful that at least she got something useful out of it. And now he was opening up again, she shouldn’t push it. He would write to Senator Rufus about her sister.

 She thanked him and then she had another question… he allowed her to ask it and she sipped her wine and said she wanted to know practical things – like how to find a mid-wife and other indeed practical questions. She thought three months was not a lot of time. Tertius thought about it, he wasn’t sure what to say to all that.

 “You won’t have to worry about the name. I suppose the baby will sleep with you… if you’ll be nursing him. As far as I recall, they also need to be tended to in the nights.” Tertius said, all that was easy to answer. Now to the others… “And I suppose you’re right, that we should find a midwife. Rhoda may know a few things, she was also here when Antonia was born. But there’s not been a child born in this house since.” He didn’t know if he wanted her to have any friends present. Perhaps for support, it could be good, but on the other hand, would she think she was getting special treatment then? And that it could always be like that, with her friends? What friends did she have, really? That was perhaps the question he should consider most of all these…

 “Which friends did you imagine to be there for the birth?” He then asked, he didn’t like to beat around the bush or just wait, when he had something important to ask. And this was, he thought. If she named her friends, he could check them and find out if he thought it proper too.

@Sara

[Sara]

Charis nodded. She wouldn't have to worry about the name, that was evidently not her domain. It made sense, even if it stung a bit. She couldn't even choose her own name of course, so no wonder she couldn't choose her childs. It didn't stop her from imagining what she'd call the little child in private though. If it were a boy Andagin for her grandfather, and if it were a girl (not that she thought it was) Letinie. They would be her private names, just for her and the child. But she was lost in her thoughts and merely nodded, trying to look as if she were paying attention when he suggested she spoke to Rhoda (presumably about the midwife?). "Yes domine, I will speak with her." 

"I..." She swallowed, "I was hoping my friend Cynane could be there, domine." She said after some hesitation. It had been months since she had thought of her, seen her. She had tried to shut it out of her mind, but their friendship had been a rock keeping her grounded her and if she was to go into the childbed with all of its associated peril, she wanted her friend there when she did. "She is a slave at the Imperial Palace, to a Princess." She fidgeted nervously with the nuts in her hand and nibbled one before she realised she was too nervous to have any more. "I have not seen her for..." Since before you locked me up, "For many months of course but she was, is, a good woman." He liked her to be honest, she reminded herself and she sighed. "I...I just don't wish to do it alone domine and if I..." She swallowed the lump stuck in her throat, "If I am to get ill or...or worse, then I should like somebody of my heritage there with me for comfort. I...don't wish to be alone." 

 

TAG: @Atrice

[Atrice]

Tertius had not really considered what name the child would be given yet. It all depended on whether he would pick the child up and thus free it after it was born, or if he would have it remain verna, as Teutus had been. He would have to put some more thought into it, although he had an idea and one he thought Charis might even like. Not that he was here to please her, but… it was her child too, after all. Currently though, he quickly moved on from thoughts on the name and to Charis’ other questions. He suggested speaking to Rhoda about the childbirth, but decided he’d also look for a real midwife for her.

Charis had also asked if any of her friends could be present for the birth of the child – and he decided to give it a chance and asked whom that might be. She mentioned her friend Cynane, whom she might have mentioned before… and she quickly added that Cynane was a slave to a princess at the palace. She seemed nervous though, when she continued speaking about her friend, saying she was a good woman and that she did not wish to be alone. She wanted someone of her own kind to be there; someone from Britannia.

“I see. Well, I shall look into it and see if this Cynane may be free. It’s hard to tell exactly when the birth will happen, as far as I know, so… I’ll see what I can do.” She might have to come here and stay a few days, he thought to himself. That would be something, to have a slave from the palace live here, if only for a few days. That could be interesting, really. There was just one issue concerning this idea with having a Briton friend join Charis for the childbirth… “If I allow it to happen and she has the opportunity to be present… you must promise me to not speak your own tongue in this house, with her. I don’t want to listen to it.” And he didn’t want them to whisper about him or talk about him behind his back in his own house. They had to speak Latin here.

@Sara

[Sara]

Charis' face lit up in a genuine smile as he agreed (sort of?) to her idea. Cynane would be delighted, when she could pass word to her friend, and she just prayed that this time Tertius would't go back on his word. She rarely spoke to Teutus nowadays, finding it too awkward, too hard, but perhaps if she pressed from that angle as well it'd convince him? She'd have to think on it. There were politics between father and son - even now the poor sod was freed - and she didn't wish to stoke the fire of jealousy between them if she could help it. 

His request was simple enough, although it pained her to agree to it, she did so nonetheless. "Yes domine, I won't speak it." She offered a half-smile, trying to lighten the mood, "A-although if a swear or two in my own-" Careful, "In my old tongue slips out in the birth I am sorry...I have heard it is...very painful and I-I will try not to but..." She offered a little laugh and sipped her watered wine. In truth, any images of the birth terrified her and she tried to blink them away. She knew she was sticking her head in the sand by pretending all would definitely be well, but better that than dwell on the possibility she wouldn't make it. She had been with friends when they had children and they had all lived, even some who had suffered fevers and the such afterwards. She would be fine. She couldn't die for his child, surely her Gods wouldn't spite her like that? 

She must have been silent for some time and she swallowed, glancing up at him. Her big blue eyes were filled with anxiety. She quickly lowered her gaze again. "I...I'm sorry domine. I was just thinking." Dwelling, more accurately. She scrunched up the fabric of her tunica in her fingers, obviously nervous.

 

TAG: @Atrice

[Atrice]

She smiled beautifully when he agreed to allow her to invite her Briton friend from the Imperial Palace. He only had one condition and that was simple enough, he thought. He didn’t want to catch them talking about him behind his back; didn’t want them to whisper together in a language he didn’t know. He’d hate that. She promised to not speak Briton together with her friend, but then said she might swear in her old tongue during the birth, because it was very painful.

Tertius nodded, “What’s said or… exclaimed during the birth is something else. But she may be here for days. There’s no knowing exactly when it will happen, after all.” But they could look for the signs, of course. He remembered those with Antonia. And then they would contact the palace when the signs from Charis was right. Silence fell between them again, it was kind of awkward, before she finally looked up and apologized for the silence.

“I suppose you have a lot to think about.” Tertius said, looking at her, wondering why she suddenly seemed nervous again. Things used to be so different between them. He couldn’t help but think about that. He hated that he kind of missed it, but there was no going back now, was there? She had apologized and all, of course, and she had been good lately, but could he really trust her? Time would tell.

“Do you ever think about how things used to be… between us… before?” Tertius then asked because he was curious about that. He hoped it wasn’t a foolish thing to ask and that he wouldn’t regret it.

@Sara

[Sara]

Charis nodded meekly. A lot to think about indeed. She wanted to talk of what would happen if things went wrong, but equally she couldn't stomach the conversation. How was she to say that she wanted to be buried rather than burned, as was her peoples way? How could she say she wanted her sister there? She blinked back emotion that she wouldn't let him see. Maybe she would write it down. In secret, on the tablet she still had and keep it. If the worst should happen somebody would find it. 

His next question caught her off guard and she looked up at him with curious eyes. Did she think about it? Of course she did. How could she not when she bore the fruit in her growing bump? She nodded her head slowly and fluttered her eyes back down respectfully. "Y-yes, domine. I do." She swallowed and fiddled with the stem of the cup she was sipping from. "I...miss it." She admitted, candidly. It should have been a lie but it wasn't. She didn't miss all of it of course. There were large parts which had almost broken her. But in an odd way, yes. Yes she did. She missed the freedom and the lack of guilt she felt, and how...simple things were, even if they were painful simple; lie on your back, let him fuck you and you can do what you wish. 

"Do you...? T-think of it domine?" 

 

TAG: @Atrice

[Atrice]

He couldn’t figure her out. He thought he had figured her out, last year, but then she turned around and decided to betray his trust instead. She had been lying to him all the time, leading him on all along and he couldn’t stand the thought of it. Tertius didn’t trust her anymore. But a part of him missed having her close, as his lover, as the one he talked to and spent time with, intimately. He missed her soft and warm body, her kisses, her touches. He even kind of missed the lessons, where he’d been teaching her how to read and write. But there was none of that now.

Still he dared to ask if she ever thought about how things used to be and she looked up at him shortly, before bowing her head, as she should. Then she said she thought of it. And that she missed it. She… missed it? Tertius hadn’t expected her to say that. She hadn’t wanted it from the start, she had done what she had to do, but she didn’t like him. And now she missed it after all? It gave him something to think about. He downed a bit of wine and then she asked him the same.

“It’s hard not to.” He said, but he could obviously not admit it like that. There was a more obvious reason though, why he could not stop thinking about it, “Since you carry around the… offspring of it.” What would happen after the childbirth? She’d stay here, of course, with the child. And he did want her. But things would not be like before.

“It’s a pity you did what you did.” He had given her so much and all she gave him was deceit. He wondered if she even understood how good she had it before. How good he was to her.

@Sara

[Sara]

She nodded to herself, smiling a little at his comment. It was true - how could she not think of the 'before' when she wore it so visibly now? Her dominus' sudden fascination with Hector made more sense to her the more she endured pregnancy. She hadn't quite understood it at first; the man was intolerably vain and cruel but she now understood that he'd never have to endure...this. Tertius would never have to worry about another illegitimate, slave-begotten child with the blonde fool in his bed. 

Her thoughts were scattered, however, at his final words. What could she say to that? She only nodded mutely with a "Yes domine. I...am sorry." Because she was sorry. She had ruined it all, jeopardised her life - but more importantly jeopardised the future of her child and for what? Some spiteful barbs in his direction! That was all! She sad nothing more, he was obviously thinking of her past transgressions and she was in no mood to repeat them by speaking out of turn. Instead, she sipped her wine and kept her eyes dutifully down, spare hand folded on her lap and silent. 

 

TAG: @Atrice

Sorry for Charis being quiet and good - let me know if you need more to go off! 

[Atrice]

Tertius could not admit to her that he missed being with her and what they had together. He could not admit that even now, he could think of the sweetness of her lips and the softness of her touch and their conversations during her lessons or in bed. There was no going back now though, after what she did. And she was right in her thoughts. This was one of the reasons why he preferred male lovers in his bed over women – males would not get pregnant. He’d come dangerously close to caring too much for them too though, like with Anteros, who pushed him yet submitted to him at the same time. Maybe that’s why he’d liked Charis.

But she did what she did and that was the point of no return, now. But it was a pity. That she had to ruin it all. He wanted to trust her, wanted to go back, but he couldn’t. The offense and her words had been too harmful.

Charis agreed it was a pity and said she was sorry and continued to sip her wine and kept her eyes down. A part of him wanted to reach out to her, but… what’s said was said and what’s done was done. He sipped his wine too. There was little else to talk about right now, was there?

“Are you more hungry or anything?” Tertius then asked, “If not… you can resume to your duties. Unless you need a rest, of course. You need to take good care of yourself.” For the sake of the child, he thought. And for her…

@Sara

[Sara]

Charis smiled softly and shook her head. “Not hungry, but thank you domine, this was very generous of you.” She uncurled herself from the couch she had sat on and pushed herself up (which was harder work than before, she begrudgingly thought!) until she was standing in front of him.

”I may lay down a little, thank you. The heat impacts me more now than it did, but I will be working again in a little while once the heat from the sun dies a little.” With a smile she set down her cup on the table and with a little inclination of her head, walked from the room. She left, however, with more hope than she had when she had entered. She just hoped she could keep her head down long enough for him to come around to her once again. She needed him to.

 

TAG: @Atrice

FIN