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You Should See Me in a Crown


Atrice

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The only other woman who knew, just how much Cynane appreciated and admired her own gender, was probably Claudia. And she didn’t tell, because Cynane was her slave and to anyone else, her opinions didn’t matter. Besides, what they had was best kept a secret. Sosia made her feel things too, but since she wasn’t so experienced with women – and didn’t have the best experiences with men – she was unsure of how to act. Think that she could be so alert and so tough with most others, but Sosia made her feel strangely nervous, but in a nice way. It was hard to explain. She almost felt like a young girl again.

 Sosia and she spoke of friends and Cynane spoke of having things in common with people. Sosia seemed uncertain now, when Cynane asked what they might have in common. The way she looked at Cynane, it wasn’t how men looked at her, but it was still… oddly alluring. She pointed out they looked similar and Cynane chuckled, no they did not, but clearly Sosia was joking. Then she went on about being strangers in Rome and that Cynane was kind.

 “You have been very kind to me. More than what I expected.” Cynane said and dared something, she slid her arm that rested on the edge of the bath up and around Sosia, “But I think our only similarity in looks is that we’re both women. Not that that’s a bad thing. You’re very… pretty…” She was rambling again and stopped herself, looking up at Sosia’s pretty face, “Would you mind if… I mean… I hope you don’t. Can I… kiss you?”

@Sara

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If Sosia looked startled, that's because she was. Of course she'd been touched before, and this wasn't the first time from a woman - she had learned in her youth that relationships with women were easier, less complicated and fundamentally...carried less risk. But this was different - this wasn't kissing somebody in the storeroom of the villa when the dominus wasn't around, this was supposed to be her home, as a married woman. She felt her heart flutter in her chest. 

There were no slaves around, she'd sent them packing earlier when her and Cynane had first entered the pool. They were alone, and there was nothing stopping her but fear. But fear was a powerful thing, especially to somebody like Sosia who lived with its shadow every day. She let out a little breath and ducked her head. She wanted to say yes. Just say yes

"N-No..." She swallowed and pulled away from Cynane's touch, cheeks flushed and biting her lip nervously as she did. If any of the slaves were watching secretly, if anybody overheard. Her position with her husband was tenuous enough as it was and well-bred, Roman women didn't go around kissing slaves or more...much as they might like to. Under the water, out of the view of anybody watching from the shadows she gripped Cynane's hand and squeezed it softly. "Not here." She added with a whisper. But if  not here...where?

 

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It felt different, and strange, to be the one who was bold and sliding her arm around the other woman. Cynane hadn’t done exactly this before and never with someone she just met. But Sosia was friendly and sweet and beautiful. Something stirred in Cynane, something in her wanted more of Sosia, if only the other woman would let her. Usually it was the men who’d do what she did, but would they be so kind and ask if they could kiss the woman? No, they’d just do it. So she wasn’t like them. At least she didn’t think so.

 Sosia looked startled though and after a few far too long moments, Sosia pulled away and said no. Cynane felt… embarrassed. In just a few moments, so many thoughts rushed through her mind. How could she have thought Sosia would want that? She was just being friendly to a slave. Cynane was just a slave to her. Not someone she’d want anything with. Not someone she’d want. Then why did it feel like she did?

 But then suddenly, she felt Sosia’s hand wrap around hers under the water. Cynane looked at her again, surprised by her words, “I thought you didn’t… want it.” Cynane said, feeling even more stupid. Like some young girl, again… but Sosia did want it. Did want the kiss… and more? “Where then?”

@Sara

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Sosia felt her throat constrict and looked at her company with wide, almost panicked eyes. What on earth was she doing? She knew she'd had too much wine, but not enough that she wouldn't remember this in the morning. Whether she woke up at dawn with a knot of guilt or a frisson of excitement in her stomach was anybody's guess. 

"A...A taverna, a room somewhere..." She kept her voice low, still whispering. "My husband's slaves would tell him..." And as much as sleeping with another woman was objectively better than sleeping with a male slave by virtue of the fact she couldn't fall with child, her husband was jealous...and suspicious enough of her already. "I'm sorry Cynane I...I do...want to..." She swallowed again and then with a squeeze of the other woman's hand under the water, let go. "But you are probably never free to meet again..." Such was the life of a slave.

 

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If not here, in Sosia's home, where could they be then? She found that now she'd asked, she did want to kiss Sosia, she did want to caress her, but the other woman was free and although Cynane was clearly stronger than her, Sosia held all the power here. For some reason. She waited, wondering what the other would say. She began talking about a room elsewhere, because she feared the slaves would talk. Cynane nodded quietly, it was impossible, wasn't it? Every woman she was attracted to was either owned by someone else or married. Or not interested in women like that. She felt a little knot inside, but didn't change her expression. 

"I could be free." Cynane said, "My mistress is kind... I do get time off and because I'm so loyal to her, she lets me go out in Rome on my own. Like tonight." She explained, "But I don't know if you are ever free." So it wasn't going to happen. If Sosia feared her slaves would talk here, why wouldn't they talk if she went out on her own and stayed away for a long time. Long enough to spend time with someone else interested in her. 

She let go of Sosia's hand under the water, "I think I am clean now." She wasn't angry, more sad really. And she'd rather not get more attached if this was another dead-end. What a fool she was to think it could be otherwise. She had Claudia, at least... until she was given away to some man, some husband, too. Nothing would last.

@Sara

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Sosia nodded hurriedly and tried to keep hold of Cynane's hand under the water as she pulled it away. Gods was she an awful person? 

"I can be free...I can be, I have nothing to do." She chuckled humourlessly, "Just the house to run a-and the slaves deal with it mostly." She swallowed, her mouth suddenly parched and dry despite the fact that she was literally sitting in water. 

"Next week," She said as she stared hard at Cynane. "There's another theatre performance...and, and a taverna nearby." She wondered if the blonde woman would catch her meaning. She tentatively reached a hand under the water to graze Cynane's hip. Gods she felt a fool, but she couldn't stop.

 

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Cynane felt how Sosia reached for her hand, as she attempted to pull it away. Sosia said she could be free, for she had nothing to do other than dealing with the household. Cynane looked at her, wondering if she really meant it. She seemed nervous, she probably wasn't used to these emotions either. But Cynane did a better job of trying to lock them away and not letting it all seep through. Sosia was an open book, or so she hoped. That it wasn't all an act. But she'd been very nice so far. And she was very sweet.

Sosia spoke of a performance again next week and a taverna nearby. She felt Sosia touch her hip underneath the water and reached for Sosia's hand again, lacing her fingers through those of the other woman.

"I'll try to be there." She said, hoping this wasn't all just a big joke to Sosia, who was a free woman and could do as she pleased - at least in Cynane's eyes, it was so. She pulled away and stood in the water to get out, "Thank you for the bath. And... for everything." She said and looked around for a cloth to dry herself with. It felt so strange, she should be happy that Sosia did want to see her again, but for some reason, it still felt sad in a way. Because they couldn't just do as they pleased, right here and right now. It had to be a secret; they had to wait. That was the sadness of it. That and the fact that it might never be more than an infatuation, since Sosia was married and Cynane a slave.

@Sara

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