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learning to live again (is killing me)

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AUGUST 76 | dinner at his domus | what better title than a song about trying to move on with a new relationship? 

When Lucius Safinius Regillus had approached him about sitting down to dine together, Titus was fully aware of the outcome that the man was desiring. For Titus to spend the evening charmed and conversing with the man's only daughter. It was the same as every father that approached him after Caesennia's death. Always the same. Known named, connected to the most powerful family in all of the Empire, along with having that family's adoration. Never realizing that he had loved Caesennia, deeply loved her. Never realizing how much damage her death had caused him. Nor the hollowed ache that lived in his chest for so long. Nor how long it took for him to actually feel human emotions again, and not just fake them for the sake of his sons and daughter. But he did it anyways. He sat through each meal, listened to the idle chatter of the family that he had either visited or invited into his home. 

Just like tonight. 

August's heat hung onto the city like a smothering film, the light from the latterns to light the dinning area didn't help the situation. He had successfully drowned out the excessive chatter from the mother, and occassionally muttered in either agreement or disagreement to Lucius whenever the subject of conversation turned to matters of state and their senatorial duties. A dull ache coming to his left temple as he picked at what was left of his food before finally bringing his eyes to study the young woman that had came with her parents. She wasn't unattractive by any means. A typical Rome beauty, dark hair that was styled fashionably, light eyes that was compariable to the sky on a clear day. An appearance that would be an added bonus if they found themselves well matched in personality. 

He supposed he should get to know the girl, without her parents influences.  

"Would you like to take a stroll around the garden?" He asked her after making his assessment of her physical traits, glancing over the elder female slave that acted as housekeeper to follow them if she did, so she could act as chaperon. 


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Safinia had finished sewing the edge of her latest gown that her mother had brought to her just a plain teal. Teal? Teal was hardly her color. A dark blue certainly. But she had told herself she would make do with the dress she had been given. She wasn't told what it was for until she finished the last stitching. The dress was tried on and an adornment was attached to her head. A headpiece so to speak. As her mother came to inspect, she had smiled upon her. That was when she knew something was upon the suspicious when her mother smiled at her. At late, she had been very much cross with her. Safinia understood her parents wished her to be arranged to a suitor but Safinia was not entirely hopeless. She had the cunning of her father, the beauty of her mother but also she being a woman of her own kind heart. So she was a little opinionated but what good roman lady was not? It would be beneficial to a good ear but she tried lately to not over do it.

But back to the matter on hand, her mother's smiles gave her great cause to pause as she looked to her mother. "Mother, you are smiling. Is there news?" She asked her mother as she stood up, letting one of the house slaves fix up her hair. Safinia turned to the lady helping her and thanked her. No news,my sweet daughter but you should look your best. We will have a guest dining with us in the evening. That's when Safinia's smile turned to a frown. The last time she had heard that spoken was another suitor coming to the house. Her mother looked to her and fixed her cheeks reminding her that her father was a senator and thus would have friends who were guests in their home. But Safinia knew her mother's twisting words. Titus Flavius Alexander was the name her mother spoke and with such high esteem that she should be kind and do well to be within her manners. Here it was again. The same battle that Safinia would thus face. But she did feel bad for the man. No doubt her mother and father would talk his ear off. Safinia however, was determined to however provide a bit more voice and thus probably save what would be a disastrous meal. 

The meal was pleasant but not too bad but her mother's instant talking was enough to make her want to drown in wine. From time to time, she had glanced over at Titus, trying to figure his body language to a topic upon hand. He wasn't an very unattractive man. Handsome of course and she couldn't help but sneak a few glances. But more so to see how much in pain he was at a conversation her mother lulled him into. The poor man looked bored out of his mind. Then again, so was she. There was more a few times that she did try to speak up, try to chime in but more often than not, she was cut off by her father. Did he expect her to keep and be silent? The look of annoyance on her face was ever constant. 

However, Titus offer of a walk around the garden was like he saved her from an utmost execution. Before her mother could cut her off. She nodded and spoke up. "Yes, I would love to. We've both been sitting to eat for a while. Fresh air will do us good." She looked to their housekeeper/ elderly slave who nodded and joined Safinia as she stood up. She gave a plesant smile as she motioned to the path and started to walk. She would then whisper. "My first apoligies to you for having to hear my mother's constant rantings. Though, I am impressed. You've lasted longer in a conversation with her than any other person."


Edited by Emy
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