What Could Have Been?

[Chevi]

Ovinia appeared, just as pale as the slaves, looking more than a bit confused. She did not expect to see him here. Apparently she did not expect the fire either

"T-The house is safe. And Spurius isn’t home yet. We’re not going anywhere!” 

Lucius blinked. What was she thinking? She had to be in shock.

"The house is not safe. The fire is closing in on this neighborhood. Everyone needs to go." He said steadily, stepping up to her. "If your husband is not home, he won't make it here now. Where is your daughter?"

[Sara]

She didn’t believe him. Well, the rational part of her did, but the irritation part that was frozen in shock and fear was winning out and refused to comprehend what he was saying. She swallowed and shook her head, moving deeper into the house and into the garden. The ash was falling like snow.

”The villa.” She said distractedly, casting her eyes around the domus. Everything she owned was in here. Everything. “With her half-brothers. Spurius and I are going tomorrow. He went out to see friends this afternoon, he’ll come back.” She was frowning to herself, the ash collecting on her hair, on her eyelashes. He’d come back.

 

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[Chevi]

As was falling, and it wouldn't be long before sparks started descending like fireflies. Ovinia was standing around frozen, not comprehending what was going on. Her children were gone, and so was her husband. Damn the bastard. The city was already catching fire when he had left.

"Ovinia listen to me" he said calmly, putting his hands on her shoulders. "The fire is going to reach this house soon. You need to go. You are responsible for your slaves. Lives are more important than this house. You need to do this. Tell them to go. Grab your jewelry and whatever money you have. Leave the rest. We'll make sure to get you to a safe place. But you need to move now. Alright?"

[Chevi]

As was falling, and it wouldn't be long before sparks started descending like fireflies. Ovinia was standing around frozen, not comprehending what was going on. Her children were gone, and so was her husband. Damn the bastard. The city was already catching fire when he had left.

"Ovinia listen to me" he said calmly, putting his hands on her shoulders. "The fire is going to reach this house soon. You need to go. You are responsible for your slaves. Lives are more important than this house. You need to do this. Tell them to go. Grab your jewelry and whatever money you have. Leave the rest. We'll make sure to get you to a safe place. But you need to move now. Alright?"

[Sara]

Ovinia blinked, eyes wide and startled as hands found her shoulders. She stared at him as if he was speaking a foreign language. He seemed so serious, and she broke eye contact to gaze up at the sky above her. It was glowing, faintly. The ash was burning her eyes.

”Will I die if I stay here?” It was a stupid question - if the house caught fire of course she’d not escape, but she needed to hear it. When she did, she nodded dumbly.

She felt like she was walking through mud as she pulled away from Lucius and hoarsely ordered a slave to leave and tell the others to as well. She moved slowly to her bedroom. Everything was packed for their journey tomorrow. She wasn’t ready for this. She wasn’t even wearing shoes. One of the slave girls helped her into sandals unprompted and wound a palla around her waist. She was just wearing a tunica, not a stola. She hadn’t planned on leaving the house. She numbly accepted a bag of some of her more precious jewels, her mother’s. All she had left of her. She moved back through the house to see Lucius.

”I-“ She blinked. “I don’t know where the money is kept.” She swallowed, shock and numbness turning slowly to fury. How could he have left her here? “I don’t know where he keeps his fucking money.” She was given an allowance but that was it. 

The slaves were streaming out of the house now, Spurius’ secretary among them. Nobody else would know. She choked. “Where am I supposed to go, Lucius?”

 

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[Chevi]

"Will I die if I stay here?”

"Yes." She wouldn't, because he was prepared to drag her out of the house by force if he had to, but that was now why she asked. She finally seemed to realize that she had to go. And that her husband was not around to help with this. Ovinia went to her room and returned, dressed and carrying her things. The slaves were leaving too. Ovinia still looked dazed.

”I- I don’t know where the money is kept... I don’t know where he keeps his fucking money.”

"Well, then that's his fucking problem." Lucius stated, escorting her out of the house. The heat was intense now, and everything turned grey and orange.

“Where am I supposed to go, Lucius?”

"They are setting up shelters at the Amphitheater" Lucius told her "And at the gardens of the Palatine. We are keeping a clear path for people to get there." he hesitated. He did not want to let her wander off alone like this. The vigiles were trying to keep the order, but fighting the flames came first, and crowds could be dangerous even on a good day. "I wish I could take you, but..." he gestured at the smoke and the flames. Someone was calling for the praefectus around the corner. "Do you think you can get there?"

[Sara]

Ovinia felt like a child again as she was all but ushered out of the house. Her slaves were long gone, evidently having listened to the advice of the vigiles whilst she'd been struck dumb like an idiot. The enormity of what was happening didn't hit her until she was outside. The streets were thick with smoke that choked her as she stood, the sky was burning an amber-orange and heat made sweat trickle down her neck. The fire could have only been a street away at most. She blinked up at him, nodding dumbly at his instructions. 

"I can get there." She didn't know if she could, she doubted she'd be able to find her way to the gardens of the Palatine or the Amphithheater in the daylight in a daze like this, let alone in the crowds and chaos of this night. She swallowed as somebody called for him. She snapped her eyes to his and then reached up a hand to squeeze his shoulder. She didn't want to let go. "I'll be fine," She tried to sound breezy, lighthearted even, but terror run under every word. "Go. And be safe. They need you more than me." She wasn't sure that was true. 

 

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[Chevi]

The last person he wanted to let go off alone when Rome was burning to the ground was Ovinia. Why was she even here? Alone? Lucius frowned. He was afraid for her, alone in the crowds with her jewelry. She looked dazed. And yet, his responsibility was to the city. He could not play favorites. Flames crackled nearby.

"I can get there. I'll be fine. Go. And be safe. They need you more than me." 

Lucius swore under his breath as she looked at him. Then he whistled.

"Gaius!" the young recruit materialized from the smoke, running. "Go check to see if the path is still clear to the Amphitheater. Take her with you.  Make sure the shelters are set up. Drink some water. And find someone to escort her to my house on the Aventine. You know the one. Go."

Gaius did not ask any questions. He looked worn, but he was ready to do whatever he was told by the praefectus. He only nodded, and stepped up to Ovinia, steering her along the street. 

"Be safe" Lucius muttered, before he pulled the cloth up over his mouth and nose, and headed back to his men fighting the flames. He had done all he could do. And the work was far from done.

[Sara]

By the time Lucius would return to the Aventine, Ovinia had calmed down. A little. Not a lot, but enough that she was able to pace about and breathe in a fashion that didn't make her chest hurt. 

Gaius had been good, he'd evidently been trained well, but there was only so much that one man could do with the prospect of a rapidly closing path - the flames jumping overhead from insula to insula, with a terrified woman in tow. Mercifully he'd had that small waterskin, she was sure her arm would feel a thousand times worse had he not had the forethought to dump it on her. She had been dressed with no care for the situation and wearing a flimsy, gauzy palla that fluttered in the breeze when walking through sparks and burning ash had gone as well as predicted. She had only been relieved that they'd been able to get it off before the whole thing had caught alight. As it was, she'd only suffered a burn on her forearm that stung but was survivable. 

The chaos in the ampihteatre had meant it hadn't been tended to by a medicus, there had been far more pressing injuries to deal with. Her stomach still lurched, hours later, at the sights and the smells she'd seen. She'd been grateful, beyond grateful actually, when she'd been shepherded through the streets up to the Aventine - thus far unaffected by the fire that was ravaging the city. But as the minutes turned to hours and she sat in Lucius' triclinium, dread pooled in and filled her chest. He wasn't back yet and it was nearly dawn. She had seen how bad the fire was; she'd felt its heat, had born its scars on her arm. How would they ever manage to put it out? How would the vigiles who were trying, ever survive it? 

She was dazed in dread, pacing around the atrium when the door creaked open. She couldn't help herself, she didn't even give him chance to see her before she was running the few paces to where he stood and throwing her arms around his shoulders in a bone crushing hug. "Are you alright?" She choked. Stupid question. 

 

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[Chevi]

The night felt endless. There was smoke, flames, panicked people, collapsing buildings, and pain; it seemed like the entire city was being devoured by the conflagration. It was hard to keep one's head straight. And Lucius had to do it for everyone. He was right in the middle of it, alongside his men, rescuing people, shepherding them out of harm's way, pulling down roofs and dodging burning debris, carrying water and giving orders. It was like an ant trying to fight an elephant. He was used to his work feeling useless sometimes but never to this extend.

And then the rain came. It started up shortly before dawn, drizzling through the thick clouds of smoke. Everyone praised the gods. Flames sizzled, ash turned to mud. A large portion of the city was smoldering in ruins. But the worst was over now. The vigiles, at the end of their strength, managed to put out the rest of it. There was more to be done, but Lucius ordered the ones they could spare to go take their rest at the headquarters, or at the shelters with the rest of the people. New recruits and reserves were called in to continue the work.

Sleep was a faraway concept at this point. Lucius walked through the shelters at the Amphitheater, making sure they were handled, and no fights broke out. From there, he walked across to the Aventine in the early morning gloom, weary, dirty, and newly soaked in rain. Gods bless the rain.

He barely walked into his house when Ovinia came out of nowhere, wrapping him in a hug. Lucius made a strained noise; there was barely any part of his body that was not bruised, burned, or sore. But he hugged her back anyway.

"Are you alright?" 

"You made it." he muttered. He had not allowed himself to dwell on what had happened to Ovinia. It would have distracted him from the fight. But now he was suddenly filled with an overwhelming sense of relief. He pulled back, looking her over. "I'll live. Are you alright?"

@Sara

[Sara]

She sunk into the embrace with fervour that she didn't know the cause of. She clung to his arms, even after he groaned in protest. She didn't let go, even as he pulled back and gave her a once over. She was fine. Well...she wasn't, but she was. She was better that he was here, standing on two legs, looking like death warmed up of course, but alive and safe. He'd saved her life, and he was fine. Everything would be fine. 

"I'm fine." She swallowed, fingers still stretched up and clutching at the shoulders of his uniform. She had lost all pretence and tears formed in her eyes, spilling over her cheeks. "I'm so sorry." She managed to croak out, "You could have been killed pulling me out of that fucking house." She'd been stupid...granted she'd been in shock, but now all she felt was an overwhelming sense of guilt. 

Lack of pretence continuing, she reached her hands up to his throat and his chin, tilting it from left to right as she sniffed back tears, "Are you sure you're alright?" 

 

TAG: @Chevi

[Chevi]

Ovinia clung to him like her life depended on it. He let her. He held her like he wanted to hold her back at her house, to let her know everything would be alright.

"I'm so sorry. You could have been killed pulling me out of that fucking house." 

"Please. If everything else failed I'd have carried you out like a sack of apples." He chuckled. But he let her fret over him, checking for injuries.

 "Are you sure you're alright?" 

"i am fine" he reassured her. "I mean, I sorely need a bath and like two days of sleep and some bandages, but I'll be alright." he looked down at her, and caught a glimpse of her arm as she checked him over. His brow furrowed. "What happened?"

[Sara]

"I won't bother you." She swallowed, and when satisfied that his head wasn't falling off, dropped her fingers back to his shoulders. She didn't want to let him go, didn't want to in case he ran back out. "I'll be gone when it gets properly light, I-I have no idea where the slaves are." Or her husband. But he was presently very, very, very low down on her list of concerns.

She frowned and then followed his eyes down to her arm. She pulled it back, finally releasing her grip on him to examine the burn. It wasn't big, but curled around her forearm. "My palla caught," She swallowed, her chest beginning to tighten at the petrifying and fresh memory of being caught in the inferno. She swallowed the lump in her throat again, trying to keep the anxiety at bay. "Your man Gaius pulled it off, doused it in water, it's fine." Though she didn't dare touch it.  

 

TAG: @Chevi

[Chevi]

"I won't bother you. I'll be gone when it gets properly light, I-I have no idea where the slaves are." 

"You can stay as long as you want. I'll have a guest room made up for you." He really did not care at this point. And her husband was not likely to come looking for her here. Maybe he was dead. Wishful thinking. He had more pressing concerns, looking at her arm.

 "My palla caught. Your man Gaius pulled it off, doused it in water, it's fine."

He saw the telltale red color of the burn on her skin. It had to hurt. 

"We can do better than that. Come on."

He led her to the small bath at the back of the house. It was barely more than a small tile pool, but there was steam in the air; the servants must have kept the water warm hoping he would be home soon once the flames were out. One side of the room had a bench for dressing, towels, a shelf on various jars and pots. Lucius picked up one of them, a small round jar with a fresh scent.

"Sit down." He nodded her to the bench "It happens that I get burned quite a lot on the job. There's nothing better for it than this. An old woman sells it on the Forum."

[Sara]

She shouldn't stay; she should go to her brothers domus - safely on the edge of the city, hopefully saved from the flames. But she didn't want to. The small home was comforting and inviting and she wanted to stay. She'd deal with the issues that already pervaded her mind later, much, much later. 

She followed him dutifully, blinking around. Since she'd arrived in the middle of the night she'd not examined his domus properly. It was nice. Nicer than she expected but looked un-lived in. She made a mental note to send flowers, when all of this was done, when she found her money and her slaves to do it, to brighten up the place. She laughed to herself - sounding a little mad. How was she thinking of flowers at a time like this? 

She sat on the bench and her eyes skirted around. "It's honestly fine." The skin was beginning to blister at the edges and she winced. She had always been horribly vain. Sods law it would scar. "You said you needed bandages." She narrowed her eyes, sniffing the last few tears away, "Are you sure you don't want a slave to do this? Play nurse to both of us?" 

 

TAG: @Chevi

[Chevi]

"It's honestly fine."

It clearly wasn't. Lucius was used to being burned now, it was a part of his life, but she definitely wasn't. he knelt down to the pool, sunk into the tiled floor, to wash the ash and soot off his hands.

"You said you needed bandages. Are you sure you don't want a slave to do this? Play nurse to both of us?"

"I don't have slaves." he smiled a little. He did not even have to look at her. "Oh don't look at me like that. I have servants. I'll wake them up in a little bit." he walked back, taking a seat on the bench next to her, and opening up the jar of ointment. "But I am just as good at treating burns as they are." He reached for her arm, but then stopped. They had crossed several lines already, not that he cared. But she did. And she had a right  to. "... unless you'd rather I go fetch one of them."

 

[Sara]

She did roll her eyes at him, as predicted. Of course he didn't have slaves; even if they were useful and better than freemen for the tasks allotted to them. How very Luicus. Case in point; had he had slaves, they'd already be here to tend to their master and his guest. 

"No." She said with a light shrug. What did propriety matter now? She'd already held him tighter and closer than anybody but her daughter, and suffered through a sleepless night worrying for his welfare. She swallowed and moved her fingers to close over his with the pot. "I don't want to see anybody else." She shook her head, laughing hoarsely. "I wish I could just close my eyes and not go back to real life, here I don't have to." 

 

TAG: @Chevi

[Chevi]

"No. I don't want to see anybody else."

She covered his hand with hers. If her burn was red and blistered, his hand had seen worse. He'd handled a lot of debris, beams and buckets and things the past two days; there were red burns on his hands and up his arm, but he barely noticed anymore. Not with her this close.

"I wish I could just close my eyes and not go back to real life, here I don't have to." 

Lucius sighed. She had to still be on shock, if she talked like that. He gently lifted her arm, dipping his fingers into the ointment, and covered the burn as carefully as he could. It had to sting, it always did, but had a soothing, cool feeling right after. He covered the burn and then lifted her arm, gently blowing on it.

"I told you. You can stay as long as you want."

[Sara]

She swallowed and let him tend to her. She winced, wrinkling her nose and screwing up her face in pain, inhaling sharply. She mumbled a swear in Greek under her breath and then cracked open her eyes as the cool sensation began to settle across her skin and the heat started, slowly to dissipate.

She glanced down to see it slathered over her skin and then she frowned deeply, seeing his hands. "You're not fine." She chose to ignore the insinuation in his words, and the feeling it gave her running up her spine. She didn't care. 

She deftly  took the pot from his other hand and dipped her fingers in. "What do I do?" She peered up at him, swallowing again as she met his eyes. 

 

TAG: @Chevi

[Chevi]

"You're not fine." 

Her would would heal. If she was lucky, and if she used the ointment well, it would barely leave a mark. Unless the various scars he had collected over the years, her skin was still smooth. And her stubbornness was still the same. She took the jar from him.

"What do I do?"

"Cover the burns" he sighed, looking at his hands. Right, they looked worse than they were. Or maybe they looked as bad as they were, he was just used to it. "You don't have to do it. I need to wash first anyway. Otherwise people won't be able to tell me from my subordinates." he added with a small smile.

[Sara]

"I want to." She offered a tight smile, feeling a flutter of nerves in her chest. When was the last time she felt like this? The villa. But before that? It had been years.

That feeling was only inflamed when he said he needed to wash. She blinked at him, utterly dumb for a minute before nodding mutely. She really should bathe herself; but despite just how flagrant she was being, she was not so ridiculous to suggest she do so now. Besides, she was more than positive that this sort of bachelor living meant  there would be no clean clothes for her to don after. 

Instead, she stood on wobbly legs and smiled down on him. "I'll be in your triclinium. I'm taking this." She held up the pot, "So you don't attempt it yourself." How ridiculous she felt now, mourning his closeness even though she was stood just a few feet away. 

 

TAG: @Chevi

[Chevi]

"I want to." 

"Ovinia Camilla, playing nurse" he arched an eyebrow at her, amused. But he was too tired to argue. He was covered in dirt to a worrying degree; there was no use putting ointment on any of that.

"I'll be in your triclinium. I'm taking this. So you don't attempt it yourself." 

He watched her walk out. Well, that made things easier. He had been wondering how to navigate this sudden familiarity with the very actual need of getting out of his clothes (and probably burning them later). Now that he was alone, Lucius peeled off his outfit with a relieved sigh, and submerged himself in the warm water of the bath. His injuries hurt and stung in various places, but the warmth loosened his sore muscles.

He emerged some time later, cleaner, but not looking any better as far as injuries went. He took up one of the towels, wrapping it around his waist, then he walked to the triclinium. The house was still quiet, the triclinium with with lanterns for lack of light from the early morning gloom. Now that he was clean, Lucius' injuries became more apparent: his torso was covered in various bruises, scrapes, and burns, and so were his arms. He was also only wearing a towel. He stopped in the doorway, giving Ovinia a look. She had had time to reconsider. "Do you still want to do this?"

[Sara]

Ovinia sat stock still on the couch, running  through an internal debate that she couldn't shake or decide on. She'd always been indecisive, which is why in her youth she was so easily goaded - particularly by the man whose house she now sat in.  She wanted to stay with him; she wanted to stay in his house and never leave. The darker, more ridiculous part of her, wanted to play dead - let Spurius move on, but then the image of her daughter filtered into her mind and she pushed back and away the selfish, awful thought. But her other choices were far baser, and far more difficult to dismiss. She sighed, frustrated at herself. 

"Do you still wan to do this?" His voice filtered through the silent room and she snapped her eyes up. The sight that greeted her was absolutely not what she expected, in more ways than one. She let out an involuntary and entirely embarrassing noise of shock. He was covered in injuries, but she would be lying if she said that was what caught her attention first given he stood in front of her in nothing but a towel. She felt a lurch low in her belly and a tightening in her chest which she pushed down. 

"Yes." She sighed, trying to ignore the way she was feeling, "You're not the first injured or shirtless man I've seen. I have four brothers, remember?" She arched a brow, trying to land a joke but the look in her eyes and way she bit her lip said she was feeling anything but confident. "Sit down before you fall down." 

 

TAG: @Chevi

[Chevi]

The look on her face was priceless. It almost made Lucius laugh, but he managed to bit it back, knowing she was already embarrassed enough. His servants were used to him not caring much about appearances; some of them were Greek, so they would have thought nothing out of the ordinary of him walking around in a towel after a bath. Having someone else's wife in the house, seeing that, though...

Still. Her look spoke volumes.

"Yes. You're not the first injured or shirtless man I've seen. I have four brothers, remember? Sit down before you fall down." 

Lucius chuckled, walking in and closing the triclinum's door before he took a seat on one of the couches. She was putting on a determined face, so he would let her treat his injuries. He rolled his shoulders, feeling the skin tighten around his burns as they dried. "Your brothers get injured a lot?"

[Sara]

Ovinia shifted on the couch and gritted her jaw, looking determined not to enjoy this. "Yes." She muttered, "They're idiots." And prone to pushing themselves too hard in their exercise now they were aware the years were catching up with them. She dipped her fingers into the jar and grimaced at the sensation; not dissimilar to the feeling of those awful grapes between her toes. That felt like years ago now. 

Tentatively, she raised her hand and hovered her hand just over his chest. There were burns that needed attention and she needed to help. He might well have got one or two of these in the course of her dithering at her home. She swallowed, guilt mixing with the other maelstrom of feelings in her chest. She placed soft fingers on his chest, gently smudging the paste across his skin. "You were amazing." Her voice was quiet, almost awed and embarrassed because of it. She didn't look at his face and instead kept her eyes on her task and his chest, "I...I mean your work. You seemed so in your element, so confident, even in all of that chaos." As people like her floundered and panicked. 

 

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